My hardest day so far (as a parent)...

Today has been a pretty hard day so far. It is my last day of maternity leave before I return to work tomorrow. I am only going back to work part time so I didn't expect to be so emotional about it. I am generally a pretty practical person.

When my son has his injections I don't get upset, because I know they may save his life.

When he had his introduction sessions at nursery I didn't cry, because I believe the social environment and many toys would be great for his development.

But today I have been teary. I know that nursery will be good for my baby and that returning to work will be fun and provide more financial stability... But part of me is really going to miss this special time, which has been just me and my son.

The time I have had on maternity leave hasn't been all amazing, it hasn't been full with excitement every day... There are days when I haven't really changed out of my PJs, days where Archie hasn't stopped crying, days when I have been exhausted.

What has made this time special is my son. Today has really made me realise that your children are only little once and how important it is to cherish the time with them. At the risk of sounding completely emotional (and making the post way to soppy) he really is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I could happily spend every day with him (no matter how uneventful).... Until he turns 14, because I have heard that 14 is the age that all children become horrible.

It also feels like the end of an era, yes I know I sound way too over the top. But I can't help it. This signifies the end of a time with my son that will never be repeated. When we have children in the future, and I have time off, I will be pregnant or have another baby to look after. So it won't be the same. This is truly a period of time that won't happen again and it does make me sad thinking that one precious stage of his life is already finished.

But I also have to remember that with this stage finishing that other exciting moments and stages are coming up. While I am an emotional wreck over it being the end of my maternity leave I can also appreciate that it is an exciting start to something else.

It feels like we are really starting family life now I am going back to work. Getting into that routine of balancing work and family, and while that is daunting (as I have no semblance of a routine at present) it is also pretty exciting to contemplate. I loved my childhood in many ways. All because of family life, the things that stick out to me are Sunday roasts, time with my siblings after school, school days and lazy weekends. All just time with my family, nothing really special but unique and memorable for their routine. Sometimes the things that we love are the simple things.

No memory makes me happier than thinking of those reliable Sunday roasts, watching Time Team as a family and wishing Monday (and school) wouldn't come around too quickly.

I feel like this is the stage we, my little family, are now entering... And I am really looking forward to every moment.

In the meantime, today I plan on doing nothing except cuddling my little boy, watching him sleep, maybe crying a little and generally soaking up every last moment of my maternity leave (and one on one time with my baby).